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Mondays with The General: Going with What You've Got

By nature, horses are unpredictable. Even so-called "bomb proof" horses have those moments where something spooks them, and you find yourself clinging to a galloping neck down a beach, hoping your horse doesn't jump the metal barrier onto a highway (see my 10th birthday for an example). When I was a beginner, I wanted stability. I barely had any riding muscles, and I hadn't been riding long enough to know all the things that can happen when you enter into a riding relationship with a horse. As I got older, and braver, I had a lot more experience, and craved those green horses, unpredictability, and the thrill of seeing what could happen taking a novice horse over a jump that was way too big. I rode consistently through college, and never imagined it wouldn't be a focus of my life, never mind that I would take any "time off." But, adulting happens, and something I once spent every waking moment thinking about suddenly became a memory. I had a few y
Recent posts

Why I'm a #SelfImprovementJunkie

We have to be humans for as long as we live. Inside our bodies.  That's kind of a crazy idea when I sit and think about it. I have interests, hobbies, things I like to do, stuff I like to research, but above ALL of those things, I have to be a human.  And do it with other people.  Why would I NOT be an improvement junkie when for the rest of my life I have to make my crazy reality and everyone else's crazy reality come together and make sense and understand each other?  This is the very short introduction to a series of posts I'm conceptualizing: #Sh*tIthinkAbout  That should be the subtitle to this blog. Cara Writes sh*t she thinks about

When a Challenge Isn't That Challenging

Then maybe stop doing it. I like challenges. Last January I did a no sugar/alcohol challenge. I've pushed myself to run 5k's and do obstacle courses. I try not to drink coffee before half my water bottle is gone. I thought doing the no social media challenge was going to be hard, but really, it hasn't been. If you follow Gretchen Rubin's work, I'm a Questioner tendency,  so I like to do things that make sense, and not just-because. So I'm ending my social media blackout early, because it hasn't been a huge challenge. The real challenge will be how to not fall back into mindlessness when I return! Speaking of challenges, Jeremy and I finished (almost) the corn hole boards this weekend. That was way more challenging than not being on social media for 12 days. I'll admit, I got frustrated, but he's a great teacher and helped me get to the end. His boards are the American flags, and mine are the blue arrows. We went to the Mets game on Sunday f

My Big Fat Greek Krisis

Sylvia Plath- The Bell Jar I taught this novel my first year of teaching, and at the time my figs were pretty clear: find an apartment, get a job.  A few years later the figs were to have fun, go out with friends, ride horses, go to graduate school, buy my own place, get a dog, get a boyfriend. In November 2016 I realized that I returned the tree. Did I choose the right ones? Did I just pick the easiest ones to grasp? What about the ones I didn't even see for myself when I was 21, and 25? * November, 2016 There’s a birthmark on my breast, and I have no idea how long it’s been there. I could consult the dermatologist who took pictures of my body at fourteen, or my most recent ex-boyfriend, but I really don’t want to do either of those. I shower, and dress, and see my body every day in the mirror, but one day, I noticed the mark. I wonder how many days I looked and didn’t see it, or how many days it actually wasn’t there, until one day it was, and how many

Mom's World in Herself

“For one human being to love another human being: that is perhaps the most difficult task that has been entrusted to us….That is why young people, who are beginners in everything, are not yet capable of love: it is something they must learn. ..But learning time is always a long, secluded time, and therefore loving, for a long time ahead and far on into life, is solitude, a heightened and deepened aloneness for the person who loves. Loving does not at first mean merging, surrendering, and uniting with another person (for what would a union be of two people who are unclarified, unfinished, and still incoherent?). It is a high inducement for the individual to ripen, to become something in himself, to become world, to become world in himself for the sake of another person.” -Rainer Maria Rilke * In order to fully love someone else, you must be unapologetically yourself, and grow your own rich inner world in order to give something meaningful to someone else. My mom has sacrificed in

Planting on a Budget

I don't know about you, but in year's past I've literally spent hundreds of dollars on plants and flowers that, let's face it, I usually end up killing before their time. My high school has a botany class that plants in the greenhouse every year, and they sell wreaths during the holidays, and herbs and flowers in the spring. This year I took advantage of both events, and I was really impressed by them! Not only are their plants amazing, but so are the prices. I was able to plant my entire upper deck yesterday for $35. $35!!!! I'm officially converted. I love having flowers on the deck, and this year was super affordable. If you like to plant, I encourage you to find a local school that has a botany program. You get to support local programs, and plant on the cheap. Win-win. I think it turned out pretty nice! Plus, I got to sip on some wine while playing with dirt and listening to a podcast. A nice way to spend the afternoon.      I learned that t

Go G-Dawg. It's Your Birthday.

Gavin is one of the first friends I made in college. He was my rock freshman year. We met moving in all our stuff into A-complex because I lived on the 4th floor, and his 1st floor apartment had a back door into the building that we   demanded very politely asked if we could use because it was pouring rain. His apartment also had AC, which I kind of hated him for, but fully took advantage! We may have had our squabbles, but he has a great heart, and an immense tolerance for people. He accepts all my quirks, and has realized that he can't bring any more hard liquor to my birthdays (I see you, Moonshine and Jack Daniels!). In the time I've known him, I don't think he's ever missed my birthday, and there were a few years there where he really saved it from being a terrible memory. He always makes the effort for people he cares about, and is a great listener. Plus, we like to talk about ghosts, so that's always cool :) So here's to you, Gavin. Happy birthday